The 11 Types of People You Get When You DD

Jenna Hoffstadt – Indy Writer

 

via icanhascheezburger.com
via icanhascheezburger.com

 

Being 20 years old while all of my friends are 21 is a tough situation. They go to the bars every chance they get, leaving me behind. I don’t blame them because I’d do the same thing if I were of age, too. I decided being their designated driver (DD) would be a good way to spend my extra time and this eventually led me to DDing others as well. Here’s a list of some of the most interesting types of people you can drive around:

 

1) Your Co-Pilot.

 

via elijahnicolas.com
via elijahnicolas.com

 

A Co-Pilot is vital when running an efficient DD service. They take the calls and plan your route while you focus on driving safely. Qualifications include a fire playlist, positive attitude and fully charged phone. Seriously, you’d have to be an octopus to run it alone! Plus, it’s illegal to be on your phone while driving…

 

2) The person who says “just me and my two friends” then brings the whole squad.

 

via cmt.com
via cmt.com

 

There’s a reason why we ask how many people you have. My Ford Taurus can’t fit six people even if you lapped it. Sorry, but we’re making two trips.

 

3) The person who smells really, really good.

 

via funnyjunk.com
via funnyjunk.com

 

They get in and suddenly the car smells like sunshine and coconut tanning lotion.  Don’t hesitate to call us for your ride back!

 

4) The person who smells really, really bad.

 

via Pinterest
via Pinterest

 

Did you puke on yourself before you got in my car? Not cool, man. Not cool. Where’s that person who smelled like summer…?

 

5) “I’ll be there in a sec.”

 

*Comes outside five minutes later*

 

via memegenerator.net
via memegenerator.net

 

When you DD, you are on a schedule. Waiting 5 minutes for one person could cost you in the long run. Be nice and tip if you’re taking 5ever.

 

6) Repeat passengers

 

via quickmeme.com
via quickmeme.com

 

These people can be a blessing if it’s a slow night and they want to be picked up multiple times. Keep handing me that cash and we’re good. Another dollar? You shouldn’t have.

 

7) The person you have class with but don’t remember their name.

 

via theodysseyonline.com
via theodysseyonline.com

 

They get in your car and immediately recognize who you are but you just know them as “girl from psychology”. Yeah, that test next week is going to suck! Don’t worry, I won’t tell the professor about how messed up you were tonight!

 

8) The emotional wreck.

 

via buzzfeed.com
via buzzfeed.com

 

This person is spilling their guts while ugly crying in your back seat. They smell like whiskey but it’s okay because you have pleather seats and the tears roll right off.

 

I am not your therapist but I can offer some sober wisdom.

 

9) The “wild goose chase”

 

via quickmeme.com
via quickmeme.com

 

There is always one person who calls you for a ride but when you get there, they are nowhere to be found and don’t answer their phone. We refer to these as the “wild goose chase”. It’s cool because sometimes you need to take a break and regroup.

 

10) Sometimes the person spent their last moment of sobriety calling you. When they get in your car, they have no clue who they are or where they are going.

 

via oovyo.com
via oovyo.com

 

They are too far gone to be any help so you start calling recent numbers hoping one of their friends answers and knows where to drop them.

 

11) Your 21 year-old friends coming back from the bar

 

via imgflip.com
via imgflip.com

 

These are the best passengers. They are filled with so much love and joy as you are their savior. Without you, they’d have to walk in the freezing cold or get on a sweaty bus.

 

You were bitter at the beginning of the night dropping them off at the bars. Now, you get to enjoy their company for a few minutes.

 

via Pinterest
via Pinterest

 

DDing can be stressful but it is rewarding. At the end of the night, you were able to help get people from point A to point B safely.

 

via Pinterest
via Pinterest

 

P.S. You all owe me a drink when I turn 21!

 

(Featured image retrieved from: http://rotwnews.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/DD-Driver.jpg)

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